Yeah yeah yeah. Kiss my backside. I know it’s not technically January 10th anymore, but when have I ever cared about the date? (unless it’s my birthday, but that’s a completely different story) First let me tell y’all what I did when I got “home” today. I sat and read a majority of my entries in this very blog! How many people can make that very same claim? Pretty damn short list, huh?

But anyway, the reason I did this is because I wanted to see how much my views on certain topics had changed or stayed the same. And the one thing that kept jumping up and punching me in the face is how much I whined about living in Atlanta and how badly I wanted to move back to MO. How big of a fucking dummy was I? True, I was unhappy in Atlanta. But now that I have had time to sit back and reflect on the situation, I’m realizing that I wasn’t unhappy with the geography, I was unhappy with the face in the mirror. I would’ve felt the exact same way anywhere I was at! But the question that is being posed to me now is “How can you be so sure that you’ll be happy in Atlanta this time around?” I’ll be the first to admit that I’m not sure if this time will be different from the last time. I’m also a big enough person to admit that I’m a bit fickle when it comes to certain things. But there is one thing that I’m hands-down, 100% positive on: I CAN NOT stay in St. Louis. This city took from me the one person that I LOVE (not loved, I still love my dad to this very day even though I’m mad at him for leaving me) more than myself. And because of that, I can’t be here because the next thing that will be taken is my life and I’m not ready to lose that just yet.

I think I wanted to come back here because I never really got a chance to close this chapter of my life (if you want to know all of the details, hit me up and I’ll be more than happy to fill you in). And everywhere that I went after leaving St. Louis the first time in 1999, I kept having this feeling inside that made me want to come back here and wrap everything up. But what I didn’t notice over that span of about 6 and a half years was that I wasn’t the same person anymore. Yeah, I know, everybody changes as they get older. But I’m not talking about that. I left here and went to Indianapolis and kinda started becoming this completely different person (Indiana is also the first documented appearance of my alter-ego, Moses). I fell in love in Indy, got engaged, got cheated on, got fired from my very first grown-up job and had my first legal drink. Hell, I had my first adult relationship in Indianapolis (and NO my first adult relationship was not with the girl who cheated on me, it was somebody different)! I’m still waiting on my second one! And then I moved to Atlanta. And that little boy who I had been all throughout high school got left on the curbside in Indy. I went to Atlanta and began to develop the adult me, the one that everyone knows today. I learned how to be a better man than I was before. Hell, I even became a superhero down there (much love to my little brothers, Superman is on his way back home). But just like anybody who has ever had that feeling of regret over actions not taken, I jumped at the chance to come back to St. Louis and finish what I started. Too damn bad the book had been closed and my character had gone on to bigger and better things. I got back here and I felt like a big fish in a small pond. I can’t go out and kick it like I want to, I’m haven’t met a woman in this city that peaks my interest for more than 5 minutes (there is one exception to that though, and if I have my way, she’ll be joining in Atlanta shortly after I get there). Basically, I feel like I don’t belong here. So, it’s time for me to go where I belong. And that’s the reason why I’m moving back to GA.

What they say is true. Hindsight is definitely 20/20. Moving to Atlanta the first time was the best thing for me to do. I went there as a raw, undeveloped young man and became who I am today. I can attribute large amounts of my personality to the Peach State. And I will forever be grateful for that. Much love from a Midwest Boy turned Down South Representa!