Good evening world! I hope this blog finds you in good health and even better spirits. As you can see by the title, I’m here to share more facts about myself that most people just don’t know. A little background before we get into it. I started this string of entries in January 2009 and have tried my hardest to be meticulous about posting a new version shortly after the New Year. Some of the items are repeated each year, but I try to add something new each time. So without further adieu, here we go…

1. I grew up as an only child and am JEALOUS of people who have siblings. I always have been and probably always will be. But if I had the choice to have siblings when I was a child, I don’t think I would really want them. I loved my childhood (for the most part).

2. I’m still probably one of the shyest people you will ever meet. I’ve been like that for years, but I’m better about approaching women now than I used to be. I still have my moments when I find it hard to speak, though.

3. I’m originally from Kansas City, MO but consider Atlanta, GA my hometown. It’s a long story as to why. Out of all the places I’ve lived, and the list is pretty long, Atlanta is the first place I felt like I fit in. I feel awkward when I go back to MO to visit. Which is one of the main reasons my visits are so spaced out. There are others, but I’m not sure this is the right forum to share those.

4. I’m still secretly insecure about my looks, which is why I love to go shopping. I always figured I could make up for not being the most attractive man if I was the best dressed. Its also one of the reasons I got tattoos. And while I’m better about not being so hard on myself, I still have a long way to go.

5. I originally got tattoos as a conversation starter. But now, my tattoos have taken on their own significant meanings, especially the one on the lower part of my upper right arm. Its my father’s nickname (Chief) in Arabic. I plan on getting more in the very near future. I thought about getting one covered up, but decided against it. I realized that my ink tells the story of my life.

6. After careful review, I realized I’ve only been in love once, and have only had 4 serious romantic relationships in 30+ years of living. I’m still waiting to find lucky lady #5, hopefully she’ll be the last relationship I enter in to.

7. I’m afraid of growing up, which keeps me from being able to commit to anything serious. But at the same time, I’m afraid of not progressing in my life. Which is why I’m prone to become frustrated by being single. I think single life is for people under the age of 25 and sociopaths. I’m neither.

8. I believe nothing is more important than family, but I avoid the vast majority of the members of my family like they have the plague. Its because I really am a creature of habits, and I spent a large portion of my life without them. So, I’ve got used to being without my family. I am trying to change that, especially since I’m approaching the point in my life when I want to start a family.

9. I don’t have a lot of friends. And the friends I do have, I consider to be family. In all honesty, I love them more than I love my real family. Which isn’t to say that I don’t love my family, but I love my friends more.

10. Speaking of friends, most of my friends are female. I’m not too sure why, though. But it has led to my sexuality being questioned on numerous occasions.

11. I love hard and fast. I can tell within a few social encounters what kind of feelings I’ll have for a woman. And once I fall for her, my feelings don’t go away easily. If she doesn’t feel the same way, I usually cut off all communications just to spare my feelings.

12. I love to write and have been writing since 1995! I actually have cried because I had writer’s block. I can still honestly count on my hand the number of people that knew that prior to this series of blog entries!

13. I’m seriously claustrophobic! I can’t even ride in small cars without getting really nervous. So if you ever are on an elevator with me and I get quiet and grab the rail, that’s why.

14. I really am a nice guy! I adopted my “asshole” persona in high school. It was my way of dealing with being rejected by a girl that I was head over heels for. Over the years, I’ve mellowed out but I still have my moments when I can be a real jerk. I’ve always said that one day I would drop the facade altogether, but the timing still doesn’t feel right. But it’ll happen one day. Maybe…

15. I really want kids and have felt that way for about 8 or 9 years, but I’m scared to death at the same time that I won’t be a good father. That fear has kept me from fully committing myself to a relationship so far.

16. I’m seriously considering going back to school, not only so that I can get my degree but I also want to join a fraternity. I’m really self-conscious about doing it, though. I’ll be 32 when I start taking classes and I haven’t been in a classroom in over 10 years. Plus, I’m not too sure what I would study. I’m leaning towards business, but that’s bound to change like the weather.

17. My birthday is Omega Psi Phi’s Founder’s Day and my dad was an Omega. But when I was in high school and thinking about going to college, I wanted to be a Kappa. The first time I said it to my dad, he punched me in the chest. When and/or if I go back to school, I wanna pledge Omega Psi Phi just for him.

18. I don’t like to talk about anything that’s bothering me, I tend to keep it to myself and try to write about it if it gets to the point that I feel the need to get it off my chest. But with the ever increasing prolonged periods of writer’s block that I’m prone to, that’s becoming more and more difficult. Maybe I’ll find somebody to talk to one day.

19. I’m really old fashioned, to an extent. I don’t believe in having kids out of wedlock, and I only want to get married once. I think that (along with some other factors that are mentioned above) has kept me from settling down or just running out and having a baby.

20. I believe nothing is more important than family, but I avoid the vast majority of the members of my family like they have the plague. Its because I really am a creature of habits, and I spent a large portion of my life without them. So, I’ve gotten used to being without my family. I really want to change that, especially since I’m approaching the point in my life when I want to start a family.

21. I’ve been diagnosed with depression, but refuse to take medication for it. But I have really valid reasons as to why. First, anything that has a side effect of “suicidal thoughts” doesn’t sound like something I want to put in my body. I can have suicidal thoughts on my own, I don’t need a pill for that. Secondly, I’m deathly afraid that anything a doctor would give me to combat depression would completely kill my vibe. While it might keep me from suffering through the low-end of the emotional spectrum, it might also prevent me from experiencing the high end. I know it sounds silly, but that’s how I feel.

That’s all I want to share for now. This might be the last year I do this, just because its becoming increasingly more difficult to come up with new things to share. Don’t hold me to that, though. You never know what this year might bring about. But in the meantime, if you have any questions, just ask. I don’t bite. Unless you want me to, and that’s a conversation for another day. So until next time, peace and love…